And Aubrey Is Their Names

Like me, Aubrey has two middle names. Anne, from her mother, and Everly from, of course, the Everly Brothers. Her last name comes from me, at least until she marries. She knows all of that. What she doesn’t know is how her first name was chosen.

 

Partly, it is from the Bread song, as she thinks, but mostly it comes from this guy. His name is Aubrey, and I really liked his name.

 

 

When I was playing basketball, Aubrey was one of the guys who used to come. He was an excellent and generous basketball player, not afraid to take the shot, but unlike most of the guys, he wasn’t afraid to pass or to set a pick or to play defense. That always made him fun to play with, but mostly I liked him because he was a genuinely nice guy. A nice enough guy that I named a child after him.

Nearly 15 years later, I bumped in to Aubrey the other night at the store. I knew I recognized him, but couldn’t place him. Work somewhere? One of the colleges? Oh, I know. Basketball. I introduced myself, and he remembered right away. He was taken aback when I told him about his namesake, visibly moved. “Well, that is a real honor,” he said.

 

 

 

If he knew my Aubrey, he would know exactly how true that is.

Another Problem With America: We Confuse Popular With Good

 

I don’t Google. Partly because Google is so pervasive, taking over most aspects of life online, but mostly because Google is not a verb.

I use a search engine called Swagbucks, which rewards users with Swagbucks (duh!) that can be saved up and used to buy stuff, everything from a computer wallpaper of Cage The Elephant (just 5 Swagbucks) to a new scale for the bathroom (6,795 Swagbucks) or full drum kit, with cymbals (37,825). All I ever buy are $5 Amazon gift cards for 450 Swagbucks.

 

Anyway, one way to earn Swagbucks is by answering the daily poll. One recent poll asked:

Which of these decades had the best music?

The results, I'm sad to say, are in the above chart.

What this means is, either it was opposite day when this survey appeared, or it was Moron Day, and 81 percent of these people have been nominated grand marshal of the parade.

As anyone older than 14 knows, the only truly great decade for music was the 1960s, starting with the Everly Brothers, Cathy’s Clown, through the Beach Boys, Good Vibrations, and Aretha Franklin, Respect, to Creedence Clearwater Revival, Bad Moon Rising.

The last half of the 1950s was good, what with Elvis and Chuck Berry and Ricky Nelson and Roy Orbison and Jerry Lee Lewis and Buddy Holly, et al, but the first half was pretty lame. Patty Page, The Tennessee Waltz? C’mon.

Dozens of songs like Unchained Melody and Stand By Me and Hey Jude have proven that they will still be listened to and appreciated 50 years later. You just can’t say that about Lady Ga Ga and Justin Bieber. Does anyone even remember the Thompson Twins?

Who Doesn’t Name Daughters After The Everly Brothers?

 

Yes, I named a child after Don and Phil, the Everly Brothers. So? I’ve been a big fan for many years, ever since my mom used to play All I Have To Do Is Dream and Till I Kissed You on the little hi-fi in our little living room. I own most of their music, some videos, some books and souvenirs, and I’ve seen them perform live five times.

 

You don’t need me to tell you how talented they are, what beautiful singers they are, and what influence they’ve had on generations of musicians. And I think Aubrey Anne Everly is a great name. Don’t you?

 

Besides, precedent was set long ago. My parents gave me four names, too. I was Larry Dean at first, but my dad crossed out Larry and wrote John Henry on my birth certificate, naming me after his father. My mom insisted that they keep Dean because up-and-coming country singer Jimmy Dean was one of her favorites. Later, we were all so proud about that whole sausage thing, too.

 

Love you, Aubrey Anne Everly.

Put Your Head On My Shoulder For Only A Nickel

I’ve said before I was born too late for my favorite music, you know, Everly Brothers, Buddy Holly, Carl Perkins, Roy Orbison, Chuck Berry, Elvis. Thank goodness for Amazon, where I just bought 111 classic oldies as an MP3 download for $5.99. That’s not a typo. I got 111 new tunes for my iPhone for less than $6, or right around a nickel each.

The collection has a lot of obvious standards common to this type of album, generic favorites like Why Do Fools Fall In Love, The Great Pretender, Teenager In Love, Rock Around The Clock, Lucille, Rockin’ Robin, Tequila, Put Your Head On My Shoulder.

But it’s also stuffed with a terrific assortment of great, often overlooked tracks, like Sweet Nothin’s, Brenda Lee, Stupid Cupid, Connie Francis, Hey Paula, Paul And Paula, True Love Ways, Buddy Holly, Hello Josephine, Chuck Berry, 3 Steps To Heaven, Eddie Cochran, Born Too Late, The Ponytails, and perhaps one of the finest songs of the generation, Smoke Gets In Your Eyes, by The Platters.

There are plenty of surprises, too, songs I’ve never heard such as True Love by Bing Crosby and Grace Kelly, Halfway To Paradise by the unique Billy Fury, and Honey Love by Bunny Paul.

With few exceptions, these are the original recordings my parents listened to on the rcar adio when they were dancing on the picnic tables at the roadside park with all the headlights pointed toward them. Hello Mary Lou is a live version, probably recorded later in Nelson’s career. A couple of the Little Richards sound live, and some of the Carl Perkins songs sound like they were recorded about the time he played the Carl Perkins & Friends Rockabilly Session, so they sound great, but not like the original Sun recordings.

Except for Hound Dog, the Elvis offerings are obscure, buried treasures like Harbor Lights and I’ll Never Let You Go. There are only five Everly Brothers songs, all classics, but there could have been more. The set is light on Roy Orbison and heavy on Bill Haley, but I could not be more pleased. If it included Birthday Party or 442 Glenwood Avenue by the Pixies Three, it would be perfect.

Check it out here.

Note from John: I saw yesterday, July 8, 2012, that Amazon had this download listed for $2.99. That's so cheap, I'm thinking of downloading it again.....

Shirt Happens, I Guess

From a trip to Memphis. I love Memphis.

Can a guy have too many t-shirts?

A gift from Kelly.

I used to tease Kelly because she had 97 sweaters, but not now. One, she gave away many of her sweaters, and two, when I swapped winter clothes for summer clothes, my t-shirts didn’t all fit in my closet. Somehow I have 80 short-sleeved t-shirts and about a dozen with long sleeves. That seems like a lot.

I've seen the Everly Brothers live five times, and
named one child after them.

It is faded, but this one is autographed by Kristen Schlukebir.

To be fair, like Kelly and her sweaters, many of these shirts I’ve had more than 25 years. Several  were freebies from the blood center, where I’ve donate every eight weeks. Most are from discount racks and flea markets, because I don’t like paying more than $3 for a shirt. Quite a few were gifts. Some I wear just for sleeping, some I’ve never worn.

Being the Best Dad is easy when you have the best kids.

Some of the ones I don’t wear are my most prized, but I think I’ve made a mistake. For example, two of the girls were summering in another state on Father’s Day, so they sent this shirt with their hand prints on it, and two sisters added theirs. I was so proud I wanted to keep it forever, so rather than wearing it, it’s been in the back of my closet since 2005.

One of my favorite live bands, unfortunately disbanded.

The same for one of my Big Smith shirts. My son Bradley and I bought it together at one of their shows, but neither of us ever wore it. I finally put it on for one of the band’s last concerts, and now wear it regularly. Of course, when you have 80 shirts, regular doesn’t necessarily mean often.

December 8, 1990

Some of my favorite shirts have come from the John Lennon tribute concerts we have in our town, like this one that has an original image drawn by Lennon and used with Yoko’s permission. I guess I had 10 or so Lennon shirts, but I wore them out.

Lou Brock is my favorite of all time, Ozzie is high on the list.

So what would you do in my position? Would you cull some of the shirts, and if so, how would you decide which to give away?

My wife and two daughtes are listed on back.

Or are you in my position? Do you have a bunch of shirts you love but don’t wear? Do you have just a few that you wear out?

A cool gift from Libby.

I would like to know.

Signs That I Am Not Much Of A Man, Part 1 Of 3, At Least

I look around and notice that I am not like the men I see.

I don’t wear gold chains and watches that weigh more than a small dog. I don’t wear cologne or after-shave, and I don’t use hair product. All the gray and white above my ears doesn’t bother me. I cut my own hair but don’t comb it. I pluck my eyebrows to get rid of the big, bendy ones, and the little hairs that grow from my antitragus.

I don’t cuss, unless crap is a cuss word. I’ve never smoked and I’ve never used drugs, except for a brief flirtation with Certs with Retsin. I was young. I’ve never tasted alcohol, I don’t drink soda pop, and I don’t eat cheese from a can. I don’t know how to bar-b-que.

I don’t hunt or fish. I don’t mind that people kill animals, whether they eat them or not, but I have no desire to be in the woods with a bunch of tough guys who drink beer and carry loaded rifles. I don’t fish because I can’t imagine anything more dull. You sit there swatting flies and wait and wait and wait, and even if you do catch one – which is exciting for those few seconds – in the end, all you have is a dead fish. I can back up a trailer, but I have no interest in boats. Bass Pro Shop holds no allure for me, although I like to go at Christmas and look at all the lights.

I would rather read than sleep or eat. I can type 72 words a minute. I own a bass guitar but can’t play it. I don’t like bands like KISS or Black Sabbath or AC/DC, but I do like the Everly Brothers, The Monkees and Ricky Nelson. I love Roy Orbison but I don’t get Jimi Hendrix. When I play music in the car, people outside the car can’t hear it.

Tomorrow, Part 2.

And then, Part 3.

Thrift Stores And Album Art, My Only Vices

I’m a nearly perfect husband. I squeeze the toothpaste from the bottom, I don’t leave clothes on the floor, and I never, ever leave the toilet seat up. With 7 daughters, I dare not.

I don’t have many vices, either. Not counting chocolate, peanut butter chocolate chip cookies, and Ben and Jerry's New York Super Fudge Crunch, I have only two vices.

Thrift stores/flea markets are one of my favorite pastimes, a hobby my wife, Kelly, taught me to appreciate. I am amazed and amused by the relentless shelves and stacks and piles of stuff, some of it rare, some of it valuable and useful, much of it worthless, and all of it interesting.

VHS tapes used to be my focus, as Kelly and I loved to find a romantic comedy for $1, get take out sweet and sour chicken, then snuggle up in front of the couch when the kids weren’t home.

Now, with Netflix, we don’t need VHS tapes, so I focus on books and vinyl albums when we go thrifting. Actually, I just look for album covers. I have all the music I want on CD and iTunes. I don’t have a turntable, so I’ve never listened to any of the albums in my collection.

I am pretty choosy about what albums I add, with 3 main criteria:

• I only buy albums that are significant to me, meaning they were something I listened to as a younger person.

• I only buy albums that have artwork that I like, and deem worthy to put in a frame and hang on my wall.

• I only buy albums that don’t cost much, $2 or $3, with a rare $5 splurge.

My most recent addition is Chet Atkins Picks on the Beatles. Mr. Atkins, CGP is one of the most talented and prolific musicians ever, and, of course, I’m a big Beatles fan. The sleeve notes on the back by George Harrison are funny.

Other recent purchases are the Everly Brothers (I named one of my children after them, that’s how much I like the Everly Brothers), Rick Nelson, and Fleetwood Mac.

Still others that I have yet to get around to framing are Monty Python, Ozark Mountain Daredevils, Harry Nilsson, Paul McCartney and Wings, Young Frankenstein (“what magnificent knockers”), and the Smothers Brothers.

If you had to pick 5 favorite album covers to put on your wall, what would they be?